A Broken Beautiful Beginning Read online

  Run away.

  S’pose I deserved it. Sometimes it felt as if she couldn't stand being around me and the sight of me disgusted her, but she would never say anything. Those were the times when I should have held her close and told her how much I loved her but instead I got my rocks off with the next club hoe.

  I broke my girl’s heart just because I’m a self-centred prick.

  Harley mumbles in her sleep, and then she gasps, opens her eyes, sits up and backs away from me enough to make her hit her back harshly on my headboard. I can understand why she’s afraid of me. If I was her I’d be afraid of me too. Her reaction however angers me somewhat.

  “Please don’t hurt me.” She whispers as she sits on the edge of the bed wrapping her arms around her legs that are now bent up to her chest in a protective gesture.

  If I really wanted to hurt her, that wouldn’t stop me but I don’t tell her this.

  “Dammit Harley! You make me sound like a monster.” I swear.

  “Look what you’ve done Raven! You tied up my momma and kidnapped me!” My little tiger emerges. I cringe when she calls me Raven; I hate that name coming from her mouth. I’m Jace to her, she’s the only one I allow to call me by my first name.

  “I know okay! Fucking hell…I know.” I stand up straight and pace the room, I don’t miss the way she flinches when I stood up abruptly.

  “I’m not going to hit you again, so stop flinching... Jesus.” I run my hands through my hair exhaling deeply. She keeps her eyes on the door behind me.

  “You’ve said that before.” She mumbles and I let out a deep breath. I move to sit next to her as close as she’ll allow. I look down at her and notice her body trembling ever so slightly.

  I lift my hand and gently wipe the blond hair from her face. She closes her eyes and flinches but doesn’t move away.

  “You need to take me back.” She whispers.

  “I know.” I whisper back. I take a deep breath then say. “I shouldn’t have taken you the way I did, I should have done things a lot differently but it’s too late for that. I can’t take any of it back but I needed to try one last time.” I say with a gruff voice.

  “One last time? Try? What are you talking about Jace?” She finally looks up at me confused.

  “To get you, make you love me… but I’m too late, aren’t I?” I clench my jaw and look down at her sadly.

  Understanding crosses her face and her body relaxes. I can feel the pity flowing from her and I don’t want her pity God dammit, I just want her.

  “Jace, we are not good together. My father may be into the whole biker scene but I just can’t do it. It’s not for me Jace and the club is you. It’s definitely you and that’s your family. You’re going to find someone, I can promise you that, and she’ll love you and support you in every way but that girl… is not me. I gave my heart away to someone a very long time ago, he made a mistake and so did I but I need to see where this goes with him. I know this is hard for you to hear but I love him Jace, I loved you too but I would never be able to support you and your role in that club. You need to let me go. Please Jace, just let me go.” She says it with such sincerity and I watch a few tears fall from her eyes. My mind still frozen on the word loved… she loved me, past tense.

  I realize in that moment that it’s too late; her heart truly beats for someone else and will never be mine the way mine belongs to her. I don’t have any more left to say. None of my words will make a difference to her feelings. The part of me that isn’t selfish wants her to be with Caleb so that Willow has her family together but the selfish part of me doesn’t want to let her go.

  I stand up and pull my phone out as I head for the door. I dial the only person I have on speed dial.

  He answers. “Where is she?”

  “I fucked up.” I say letting out a deep breath.

  I swear he growls, “Where. Is. She?” He grinds out.

  “The house” it’s all I get in before he disconnects the call. I plant my ass on the front step of my porch and wait for the punishment I know is coming.

  HARLEY POV

  I sit on his bed afraid to leave the room, I don’t know where he’s gone and if he’s even coming back. There’s a little lamp next to the bed, the room is dim but I can still see everything clearly. His scent empowers the bedroom, it used to comfort me but now it only causes sadness and sense of claustrophobia. The room is very simple and plain. Definitely manly with no woman’s touch whatsoever, it doesn’t have that homely feel my home has. The bed I’m sitting on is massive, his sheets are grey and black and the room is partially bare with only a black shiny dresser at the other end of the room. He has two little black bedside tables and there’s large arch windows to my left, letting the moonlight reflect into the dim room. From where I’m sitting all I can see is stillness in the distance. His house is so secluded and it’s nowhere near the city.

  This makes me tremble.

  My thoughts are disrupted when I hear the familiar rumble of motorcycles in the distance.

  Relief runs cold through my body. The rumbling stops and then I hear shouting and my father’s loud yelling.

  “Where is she boy?” he bellows. I hear his frantic footsteps as he comes up the stairs. When he swings the door open and I see his worried face, I burst out crying.

  He rushes over to me and pulls me tightly against his warm chest holding me tight. I breathe in the familiar smell of his leather jacket.

  “Thank God baby girl. Your momma called me frantic. Said Raven took you. That boy is fucked. Wait till I get my hands on him.” He continues to hold me tight but I push him away and look him in the eye.

  “Don’t kill him Daddy, something’s wrong with him. He wasn’t himself when he took me. We spoke and he seems diff…different now, calmer even but at momma’s house he was a different person. I think he needs help Daddy.” I plead with him.

  He looks at me thoughtfully then wipes away my tears with his rough callused fingers, “You’re too sweet for your own damn good, don’t know how you came from your momma and me but I’m so fucking glad you did. I ain’t gonna kill him Harley… but the boy is gonna have to pay for hitting my baby girl though. Sometimes we all need a push in the right direction and I intend to do the pushing.”

  I don’t argue with that instead I wrap my arms around him again. I watch Hunter come barrelling into the room over my father’s shoulder, his stance relaxes when he spots me in my father’s arms. He puts his hand on his chest and lets out a deep breath.

  “Take her back, I’ll deal with him.” Daddy gives me one more kiss then walks out the door.

  Hunter sweeps in and holds me tight against him.

  “I’m so glad you’re alright.” Hunter says against my shoulder.

  “Did he call you?” I look up to him.

  “Yeah he did, we already knew he took you though.” He looks around the room then back down at me. “Let’s get you back to Willow, Princess.”

  I don’t see anyone in the house as we leave, Hunter walks fast enough that I don’t have the time to take in my surroundings.

  Everything’s a blur.

  As I walk down the steps toward Hunter’s car I see my father’s bike along with a few others parked near the barn. Hunter grabs my elbow and pulls me towards his SUV. He doesn’t want me to see what they’re doing to Jace and I’m pretty sure he doesn’t want to see either. Throughout the ride back Hunter keeps asking if Jace had hurt me, he relaxes a little when I tell him he didn’t. He still looks every bit as pissed off though. We don’t talk much along the ride home but I feel Hunters worried eyes on me every now and then.

  I jump out the car before Hunter even has a chance to park. He calls for me but I need to make sure my mother and Willow are okay. The door is open when I walk in, Anna holds my mother in her arms as momma weeps. I never thought I would see both my mother’s comforting each other.

  “Harlz.” Caleb’s big strong arms pull me in. “Thank God you’re back.” He says in a muffled voice.
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  I hear my name being called, and I’m pulled from Caleb’s arms into Anna and my mother’s arms. The twins are here too and so is Holly. After everyone gets their hug and I reassure them that I’m fine, I look around for Willow.

  “Where’s Willow?”

  “She’s sleeping in your room baby, she cried for you but she doesn’t know what happened.” Caleb says holding me close and kissing my forehead.

  I lean into his protective touch and take in his familiar musky smell. It comforts me and I don’t want to let him go but I need to see my little girl.

  He leads me out of the crowded room toward my old bedroom. The door is a slightly ajar and I push it open the rest of the way, my little Angel is curled up fast asleep. I tip toe into the room and climb in next to her. I bring her into my chest and hold her tight. She stirs in her sleep, rolls over then searches for my hand. I give it to her and she reaches for my finger. Holding it tightly, she falls back to sleep.

  I feel the blankets move behind me and the bed dips as Caleb climbs in closely on my small double bed. He leans over me and looks down at our daughter in my arms. He then looks at me and kisses my shoulder softly.

  “I love you.” He whispers. “I love both of you…so much. I don’t ever want to lose you again baby.”

  He wipes a tear that falls down my cheek as I whisper. “I love you too… you two were all I could think about while I was with him. I missed you. I know I said we should wait and take this slow and I still want to take it slow but I don’t want to wait anymore. You and Willow are my world. I love you so much Caleb, we’ve wasted so many years being apart. I want our family together; you, me and Willow.”

  He wraps his arms around both Willow and I and rests his head in my neck kissing me gently. I feel the droplets of his tears running down my collar bone.

  He lifts his head with tear shining eyes, “You don’t know how long I’ve been waiting to hear that.”

  HUNTER POV

  “What the fuck is wrong with him?” I slam my hands onto the steering wheel as I drive back to Raven’s house. I’m dreading having to do what I’m about to do, but I know I don’t have a choice in the matter. Grimm won’t let me be excluded from this, he sees Raven and I as brothers… meaning I have to have a part in his punishment.

  I don’t know if I could ever willingly hurt the man…he saved me after all, but now it is my time to do the saving… and that is exactly what I plan on doing, no matter how hard it is for me to do.

  Raven completely lost it this time and he needs to pay for what he did.

  I walk up to the barn, it’s a dark night tonight but Raven’s house is lit like a fucking Christmas tree. Lights fucking everywhere…I don’t know what his obsession is with lights but I do know it’s a touchy subject. When I was around sixteen, I asked him about it… well, I kind of teased him about it.

  I walked away with a broken nose.

  I didn’t bother to ask again, I knew it was a sensitive topic, something he wasn’t proud of and I knew that feeling all too well considering he wasn’t the only one with skeletons in his closet…

  Grimm’s yelling followed by Raven’s loud cries of pain echo in my ears as I stand outside the barn. Hurting people is my job, I love taking out all my anger and hate for the world on my targets.

  Their cries for help, pleads for mercy or the fear when their eyes meet mine knowing that everything ends with me.

  Raven is the beat-up guy…I’m the clean-up guy. He never had the stomach for dealing with the dead and I never had the restraint to stop when it comes to causing pain. He works out his anger by using his fists to give out reminders and when those reminders go unanswered… I’m the repo man coming to collect.

  Payment being… your life! I don’t get off on hurting them, it doesn’t satisfy me.

  I need more, like I said… skeletons in my closet.

  My targets get a look of panic in their eyes when they realize that my face is the last face they will ever see. That’s the look I yearn for; it keeps me from allowing the demons of my past to take over my future. Hearing the cries of someone I call my brother though, someone I see as a brother, is a lot different. I’m struggling to restrain my urge to protect him. I so desperately want to watch the life drain out of each and every person that is hurting him right now but deep down I know that this is the way the Club deals with its brothers and this is the only way Raven will recognize his wrongs.

  “You think you can put your hands on my daughter, boy? You think I’ll let you hurt the mother of my child then take my baby girl and let you get off without punishment?” I peak through the slit in the barn door to see Raven lying on the floor and Grimm kicking him in his stomach.

  I clench my fists and bite my tongue trying to keep my mouth shut. A few of the other brothers sit around watching the scene, all looking pissed off. None of them enjoy beating up on a brother, but it’s better to teach him his lesson now then have him being killed for it when he does something too horrible to fix.

  Raven tries to speak but it comes out in a garbled mumble as he spits blood out of his mouth.

  Grimm kicks him again, “You think I want an answer from you! I didn’t ask you to speak!” My restraint can only take so much, so I turn around and squeeze my eyes shut and take a few deep breaths before turning around to open the barn door. The rest of the brothers turn wide eyed as they notice me, few know what I’m about but these men know me and what I do. They also know how much I protect Raven and that I’d do anything for him. By the way they all stand up straighter, eyes fixated on me, I’m pretty sure they think I’m about to jump Grimm.

  I cross my arms over my chest and keep my eyes focused on the man lying on the floor. From the corner of my eye I can tell that they’re buying the bravado show I’m putting on because they all relax.

  Raven groans as he turns his body on the ground, his head turns and his swollen eyes meet mine. Blood runs from his mouth and nose but a small smile on his face forms when he spots me. He thinks I’m here to stop them but he doesn’t know that I’m only about to inflict more pain on him.

  Grimm kneels down and looks Raven dead in the eye. I can tell how hard this must be for Grimm, he put all his trust into Raven to look after his daughter and Raven took advantage of that trust.

  Raven and I were the only options for him, the only ones young enough and wise enough for his plans, he was going to make one of us watch over Harley, convince her to accept the Club as her family.

  Grimm knows about my issues, I’m not one for physical touch and the only other option was Raven and seeing as Harley was already close with Raven due to the car accident, it only seemed fitting. If I had known then what I know now, I would’ve been the one to look over Harley from the start.

  Even though Ryan, road name Buck, was in the picture taking care of Raven, Grimm still took him under his wing. When Grimm found me, he took me in too. The man never stopped talking about Harley, I swear the moment I actually saw her for the first time I felt as if I had known her for years. Grimm made sure to tell us every waking moment how he prayed for her to be an old lady to one of us. I think the man had it all planned out in his head the moment she was born but unfortunately while he was forcing Harley onto Raven he didn’t realize that his daughter had a different plan in mind…. One that didn’t revolve around being part of his club.

  Grimm’s hands shake as he leans down to speak to Raven. He looks up and motions for the rest of the guys, including Buck to leave the room. I don’t move a muscle and when Grimm looks up to see me still standing there he doesn’t tell me to leave either. I hear the barn door close after the last person leaves.

  “Jace…” Grimm lets out a deep breath as he looks down at his own hands, wiping away the blood on his split knuckles over the denim jeans he wears. Grimm never calls Jace by his name and this surprises me.

  “You don’t realize what you have done…” he takes a deep breath shaking his head.

  “You think about putting your hands on any on
e of my woman again and I promise you boy… I’ll get Hunter to put you down.” Raven and I both shudder at the promise that Grimm’s voice holds.

  I don’t think Grimm realizes that I would never be able to fulfil that order if it ever did come to that. I would do anything for Grimm, I’ll be loyal to him until my time on this earth is up but that is one thing he can’t ask of me. Raven’s death will never be at my hands.

  Fury surges through me, I’m angry with Grimm for even thinking I would kill my brother and I’m furious with Raven for putting me in this predicament. I watch as Grimm ruffles Raven’s thick black mess of hair before standing up, Grimm shakes his head, the disappointment in his face can be seen so clearly.

  He walks up to me, I’m a taller than Grimm and although he is made of muscle, I’m a lot bigger than him.

  He looks up to me as he speaks. “You know what I expect of you Hunter. Don’t be a pussy and disappoint me. I know he’s your brother but this is the only way we can help him. We’ve tried the talking thing…it doesn’t work and I won’t let him hurt any of our woman in the future. Think about Willow Hunter.”

  With that being said he leaves, I think about Willow, I think about how small and fragile she is and then my mind moves onto the terrible things that I went through at the hands of people who never got punished for their actions.

  A red haze takes over my mind, and I turn to Raven.

  He cries out when I pick him up by the front of his shirt.

  “Why did you do this? Brother, do you see what you’re forcing me to do!” I scream at him. He closes his eyes and cringes, holding his hands over his ribs.